How parents can model a change in attitude towards sexual and reproductive health and rights

Hello and welcome, listeners! In the program this afternoon, we will discuss how parents can model a change in attitudes towards sexual and reproductive health and rights, also known as SRHR.

I will take you to one of the districts in Malawi where youths are busy with various activities that help to develop their area.

But before we go, let’s hear about some of the challenges that youth face as far as sexual and reproductive health and rights are concerned.

Jacqueline Zambezi Mawanga is the Community Programmes Manager for Maikhanda Trust, an NGO that aims to empower adolescent girls to make decisions regarding their own sexual and reproductive health.

These adolescents face a lot of challenges. Most do not know what sexual and reproductive health and rights are all about. That’s where we help out, or where they themselves can source information where it’s available.

Let me give a broad definition of sexual and reproductive health and rights, or SRHR. Here’s what we can say: Enjoying sexual and reproductive health and rights means that people are able to have a satisfying and safe sex life and that they have the ability to reproduce and the freedom to decide if, when, and how often to do so. Part of this is the right of men and women to be well-informed and to have access to the safe, effective, affordable, acceptable, and legal family planning methods of their choice, along with the right to access appropriate healthcare services.

It’s also important to note that, when we talk about SRHR, we’re talking about services, but there are also commodities such as condoms that need to be purchased. Youth need to know where they can access condoms.

We discovered that they cannot access these services in some areas. Sometimes they are too far away from health service providers, or the service providers may not even be friendly.

This lack of access and lack of welcoming them pushes young girls away. They may feel shamed and stigmatized for even trying to access the services they need.

Another challenge is lack of parents’ acceptance. Young people look at their parents as their role models, so whatever they say has a great impact in their lives. So, if parents do not accept them accessing these kinds of services, it’s another barrier.

Why do you think parents do not allow them to access these services?

Culturally in Malawi, we say that young people should not get involved in sexual activities. Parents regard this as bad morals. But they overlook the fact that, though their children are young, they are already active sexually. And it’s a challenge for parents to accept that.

So we need to reach out to parents as well. We need to let them know that it’s important for young people to access the kinds of services that help them prevent unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted infections. Most importantly, we need to let them know that these services will improve young people’s overall health and well-being. Services like these help young people make informed decisions, have more control over their futures, and focus on creating the lives they want!

Listeners, we have heard from Jacqueline Mawanga about some of the challenges that youth face regarding sexual and reproductive health and rights.

Now, let’s all jump into a vehicle. We are going to Ntchisi district. From the capital city of Malawi in the central region, we will be heading northeast, and it’s a two-hour drive. Ntchisi is a hilly area with cool weather.

We are here, in Mwansangu village, Traditional Authority Malenga.

SOUNDS OF YOUTH VOICES

A boy in dark blue jeans and a red T-shirt is a chairperson for a group known as Mwansangu. This is a youth club that was organized with the help of Maikhanda Trust, an organization working in this area. The boy’s name is Joseph Banda.

Welcome to our program, Joseph.

Thank you very much.

We have heard of your group, and we just want to appreciate what you are doing. We see some of your friends playing football—what else are you doing here?

We have various youth activities. We play football as you have seen, netball, drama performances, and we also take care of the environment by planting and taking care of trees. These activities act like bait for the main aim of the group, which is to discuss and share information about sexual and reproductive health and rights.

Boys and girls join the group, depending on what activities they like. After participating in activities, we gather and share information on sexual and reproductive health and rights. Maikhanda Trust gives us lectures on how we can take care of ourselves and improve our overall health. We also learn how to avoid early pregnancies and sexually transmitted infections such as HIV, and also where we can access contraceptives. We know it’s our right to access contraceptives and to have accurate information about our health.

Without this group, where else could you get such information?

Aah! I don’t know of anywhere else to get this important information. At first, it was difficult for us to talk about sexual issues, let alone talk about contraceptives.

What about discussing these issues with your parents?

Yes, parents can help, especially these days in our area, because parents know why we gather here. In the past, it was difficult for us youth to discuss sexual issues with our parents. How could we start? Where could we start from? We could be slapped if we dared. But now, both children and parents have accepted that the world is changing. So the times when children and parents felt shy of talking to each other about these issues are gone.

With what we learn from Maikhanda Trust, we know we can freely discuss these issues with our parents. And because we trust our parents, we believe in the advice they give us. So they are the primary source of that information.

But how can a conversation start between a parent and a child on issues related to sex?

They approach us in a simple way. For example, they might call us during a household chore, say, shelling maize. They might start by asking questions on the type of friends we have, how helpful they are, what topics we discuss most … and then in the process, they raise issues related to sex. They give us good and relevant information, information about having safer sex like using condoms and other safe contraceptive methods. It’s good for parents and youth to open up on these issues. Sexual health is a part of overall health! So being open about these issues helps us stay healthy and happy.

How have you benefitted by being in this youth group?

The education I received on sexual and reproductive health and rights from the Maikhanda project has helped me make better-informed decisions, and that has helped me reach my full potential. I am now a fourth-year student in geological engineering. This is special in our district because many young people do not make it past secondary school. My older brother left school in the third year of his secondary education and he is now one of many youths who wish they had possessed the information to make better decisions.

Very interesting. Well, dear listener, you have heard from Joseph, member and chairperson of Mwansangu Youth club. He has a positive feeling about talking with parents about SRHR issues, and thinks parents can play an important role in modelling changes in attitude towards SRHR.

Some of the challenges are that young people often hide sexual issues from parents, thinking that when parents hear them talking about these issues, they will be punished, or that it’s shameful to discuss sexual issues with parents. Those attitudes are the ones we will address in this program.

MUSIC

Let’s now hear from another member of the club. Her name is Sarah Kamwaza, and she’s 17 years of age. Sarah’s mother encouraged her to join the group after they had a series of discussions about sexual and reproductive health and rights.

Indeed, I joined this group after talking with my mother about these kinds of issues . At first, I was very shy to talk about them with my mom, though I was comfortable to talk with my friends. But later, I realized that the information I was getting from my friends was misleading. My friends were just encouraging me to have a boyfriend and, as they were doing, have sex with the boy and enjoy my life. They didn’t tell me the possible consequences.

But when I told my mother everything my friends told me, she was not only surprised but also scared. She told me that having a boyfriend is not a problem, but having unsafe sex could end up in an unwanted pregnancy, and even getting sexually-transmitted infections like HIV.

This scared me. So I opened my ears to hear more. She told me that my education would be disrupted if this happened to me. She advised me that I should by all means abstain from sex, but if I couldn’t, I should insist on using a condom. Later, she advised me to join this group for further guidance on my sexual health. This is when I came to realize that parents can really play an important role in this aspect, too.

Can you call the head of the youth group so that we can hear more from her?

Azakhali … Azakhali (Editor’s note: Azakhali means “aunt”)

Welcome, Azakhali. First of all, tell us your name and your role in this group.

My name is Gladys Robert and I am the leader of this youth group, and a parent as well.

I play a parental role to these young stars. I talk to them the way their parents are supposed to do. Some of these youths’ parents do not feel comfortable discussing sexual and reproductive health and rights with their children. But when they come here, I talk with them. We are trying our best to help the parents to be flexible with their children on these issues.

You know, before this group, there were a lot of school dropouts and forced marriages because of unplanned pregnancies. There was no one who gave these youths guidance.

Thank you very much, Azakhali. First you heard from Sarah, who said that she got misleading information about sexual and reproductive health and rights from her friends. But now she is on track after openly discussing these issues with her mother. And then Gladys Robert or Azakhali said that she is trying as much as possible to engage parents to be flexible about discussing SRHR issues freely with their children.

But can a parental voice really cause a meaningful positive impact?

Thokozani Kaledzera is the youth-friendly health services coordinator here in Ntchisi.

: Parents can play an important role by discussing SRHR issues with their children. First and foremost, parents need to be interested in the sexual and reproductive health of their children. Most Malawian parents leave discussions of sex to aunties, or anankungwi (Editor’s note: cultural and religious leaders). But they may pass along beliefs and attitudes we do not want in our children.

Parents need to understand that this is the twenty-first century and most children are exposed to a lot of things through the internet and peers. So they need to put aside their reticence and face the fact that these issues are real.

Poor parental involvement in SRHR issues puts adolescents at higher risk of unwanted pregnancies and other problems, while some cultural and religious beliefs can have the same effect.

Parents also need to realize that talking to their children about sex will not encourage promiscuous behaviour. However, it will help them make informed decisions. Most parents do not have adequate knowledge of these issues, and this can result in negative attitudes. So it’s important to engage parents. For example, we hold community mobilization and awareness meetings where parents and other community members get involved. Parents need to be at the forefront of educating their children on SRHR before they get wrong information from their peers.

One more thing we have come to realize is that many girls are willing to talk to their parents about these issues, but the parents are not willing to talk. And when girls realize that their parents are not willing to open up to them, they are uncomfortable talking to them. Even when girls are sexually abused, it may take a long time for them to disclose this to their parents for fear of being judged or shouted at. Children whose parents are comfortable talking to them about these issues are better able to make good decisions and succeed in life.

Indeed, parents need to show interest in their children’s sexual and reproductive health and rights and talk to them in a friendly manner. Thank you, Gladys and Thokozani.

We would have loved to stay longer, but time is not on our side, and it’s time to go back to the capital city of Malawi.

SCENE TRANSITION

We are here at the Maikhanda Trust office in Lilongwe. Jacqueline, do you really think parents can model changes in attitudes towards sexual and reproductive health and rights?

Yes, it is very much possible. Parents just need to create a conducive and accepting environment for youth to open up. They also need to respond to them appropriately instead of only judging or criticizing them.

You know, when youth have issues, they tend to keep things inside unless the environment is very welcoming. These days, we need to sit down with our children and tell them everything they need to know regarding their sexuality. Then the children will trust us and will be able to ask for more information, and even share some challenges they have faced. In such an environment, even when they make mistakes, the parent will be the first person to know.

But how can we narrow or close the communication gap that still exists between children and parents in some families?

One way is through the media and the government sharing information and educating people. This could help parents learn about sexual and reproductive health and rights. Just as importantly, it could help parents learn the importance of creating a home environment where their children feel comfortable discussing sexual health. This could be done through flyers, leaflets, radio, and other platforms. So, both parents and the government have roles to play.

Parents should be able to discuss sexual health with their children as they would any other aspect of their health. They should also encourage their children to access sexual and reproductive health services—even when they are not experiencing any problems.

What would you say to parents, the custodians of our culture, and religious leaders?

It’s time that religious leaders, custodians of our cultures, and parents accept the reality of youth accessing and using sexual and reproductive health services. And they must also advocate for such services. By advocating, we mean promoting them and directing youth to the right place to get the right services.

That was Jacqueline Zambezi Mawanga, the Community Programmes Manager for Maikhanda Trust, concluding our program this afternoon.

In this program, we looked at how parents can model a change in attitude towards issues related to sexual and reproductive health and rights or SRHR, by more openly talking to their children about these issues.

We heard from our guests that parents need to show interest in their children’s sexual and reproductive health and rights, and talk to them in a friendly manner. They should not leave the task of talking to them on these issues to someone else. Parents should be a primary source of information for their children. They should also take the initiative to ensure that they receive information through credible sources so it’s up-to-date and accurate.

We also heard that authorities responsible for the media should share information and educate communities on the importance of creating a conducive environment for communication between parents and their children. If we can do this, we can reduce unwanted pregnancies and sexually-transmitted infections, and improve the overall health and well-being of young people.

We have also heard about organizations in Malawi that help young people learn about their sexual and reproductive health and rights, and access sexual and reproductive health services. The organization discussed in depth today was Maikhanda Trust, and another organization is YouthWave Malawi. Listeners, I encourage you to seek out these services and talk to health centres and youth groups in your community for a referral to more services.

On that note, I am afraid we have come to the end of our program today. Many thanks to Jacqueline Mawanga and Thokozani Kaledzera from Maikhanda Trust, and Joseph Banda, Sarah Kamwaza, and Gladys Robert from the Mwansangu youth club, for contributing to the program.

Till next time, I have been your host, Andrew Mahiyu. Good bye.